do you ever wonder what you would look like at your full potential like perfect hair and clear skin and a perfect body like damn
*ducts tapes my laptop together*
*duct tapes my life together*
isnt that what i said
The idea that people had sex before the 20th century really freaks me out. Like George Washington probably got a blow job and that makes me uncomfortable.
im laghing so hard at this
i love how reporters try so hard to understand tumblr
That gif is reporters reaction to tumblr
So my parents just found out about my fourteen year old brother smoking weed because they found this on his window ledge. So in the middle of a huge lecture my dad decides to open the Baggie and smell it to see how strong it is. He immediately starts crying with laughter. THIS NIGGA HAS BEEN BUYING AND SMOKING FUCKING OREGANO. FUCKIN ITALIAN HERBS. SON. I CAN’T. I CANNOT. I CAN’T DO THIS.
This isn’t funny. That’s the gateway drug to a full blown marinara addiction. It’s good this was caught before this kid started hanging out at Olive Garden and sucking on every breadstick he can find to score another hit.
IT GOT BETTER.
some guy just asked me where the magazine section is at and i said “i dont work here” and he goes “me neither” and walked away
- boy: shit baby you're so wet already
- girl: that's actually just vaginal discharge and my body is cleansing itself from bacteria and dead cells to prevent infection and to maintain optimal reproductive health i'm not even all that turned on right now and i would prefer to go get some food or something